Baking cookies makes me happy. Here's a good old fashioned recipe.

Chocolate/Peanut Butter/Oatmeal No-Bake Cookies – Gluten Free!

 

In a sauce pan, bring to a boil the following 4 ingredients:

½ cup butter (1 stick)

½ cup milk

4 tablespoons cocoa

2 cups sugar

Boil for one minute and remove from heat.  Add the following 3 ingredients:

1 teaspoon vanilla

½ cup peanut butter

2 ½ cups oatmeal

Mix well.  Drop teaspoon sized pieces of batter onto a tray lined with waxed paper.  Cool.

These are an old fashioned, very rich tasting recipe—more like candy than cookies.

Enjoy!

I must be really happy because I have 5 sisters!

This is a good one I found on the yahoo shine website.

Your emotional well-being isn’t just about your genes or the kind of home you were raised in. It turns out that some pretty interesting factors—backed by science—play a role in how joyful you feel:

You were a smiley student

Adults with the biggest grins in their college yearbook pictures were up to 5 times less likely to be divorced decades later than those who looked less happy, according to a new DePauw University study. A smiler’s positive disposition may attract other happy people or rub off on a spouse.

You have a sister

People with at least one female sibling report better social support, more optimism, and better coping abilities, according to a study presented at the British Psychological Society’s annual conference. Sisters appear to encourage communication and cohesion in families.

You're not glued to the TV

The happiest people spend 30% less time parked in front of the tube, according to a University of Maryland study that analyzed 34 years of data from more than 45,000 Americans. They’re more likely to spend time socializing, reading, or attending religious services—habits that are linked to better moods and health.

You keep souvenirs on display

People who use mementos or photos to remind themselves of good times better appreciate their lives and are happier, says Sonja Lyubomirsky, PhD, a professor of psychology at University of California, Riverside. Good memories remind you of your “happiness potential” and promise that soon you can reach it again.

You make exercise a priority

People who exercise more are less likely to be stressed and more likely to be satisfied with life, according to Danish researchers. Compared with sedentary people, joggers are 70% less likely to have high stress levels and life dissatisfaction, the study found. Couch potatoes who start moderate exercise—the equivalent of 17 to 34 minutes a day—experience the greatest happiness lift.

You have a healthy love life

Physical intimacy is a key contributor to happiness, found a study by Dartmouth economist David Blanchflower, PhD, and Andrew Oswald, PhD, of England's University of Warwick. Married people report 30% more sex than singles, which may be one reason they also report being happier.

You hang out with happy people

Socializing with a cheerful person in your neighborhood increases the likelihood that you’ll be happy too, according to a new study. How often you get together matters most, say the researchers: People who live within half a mile of a buoyant buddy increase their odds of being happy by 42%. If the friend lives farther away (within a 2-mile radius), the chances drop to 22%—probably due to fewer get-togethers.

You stay warm with hot cocoa

Clutching a steaming beverage—coffee and tea also do the trick—can elicit a flood of positive feelings, according to a Yale University study. This may be because people associate physical warmth with emotional warmth, say the researchers. Study subjects held cups of either hot or iced coffee; those gripping warm mugs were more appreciative of friendliness in others and also felt more generous and trusting themselves.

You have two best friends

Among 654 married adults, those who said they had at least two “best friends” (not necessarily including one’s spouse) were likelier to have better mental well-being, says a study. But additional friends didn’t lead to any more happiness than just a pair.

Be Generous, Be Happy and Healthy.....

This thought comes from a Martha Stewart magazine.  I couldn't agree more:  "To improve your outlook and maybe even your well-being, start giving.  "Generous actions activate a part of the brain that is associated with feelings of joy, with hormones linked to feelings of compassion and calmness, and with slight elevations in immune strength," says Stephen Post, director of the Center for Medical Humanities., Compassionate Care and Bioethics at Stony Brook University in New York.  Studies have shown that volunteering for even a few hours per week has a beneficial effect, and older adults who report high levels of volunteerism have been shown to live longer.

This completely reaffirms my beliefs, taught to me by my church, through the scriptures where Jesus says, "Lose yourself (in service) and you will find yourself."  And also from the scriptures, "When you are in the service of your fellow beings, you are in the service of your God."  And God will bless you with happiness.

Have a generous, service filled day!  Here's a picture of my son doing service when he was a missionary in Mexico:

Wouldn't life be awesome........

.....if you had this kind of attitude ALL the time!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qR3rK0kZFkg&feature=player_embedded

I love this girl!  Talk about positive affirmations! 

Here's some good thoughts on stress.....

Stress

A lecturer when explaining stress management to an audience,
 Raised a glass of water and asked,
 "How heavy is this glass of water?"

 Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.

 The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter.
 It depends on how long you try to hold it.
 If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.
 If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.
 If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance
 In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." 
He continued,
 "And that's the way it is with stress management.
 If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later,
 As the burden becomes increasingly heavy,
 We won't be able to carry on."

 "As with the glass of water,
 You have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.
 When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden."

 "So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home You can pick it up tomorrow."

"Whatever burdens you're carrying now,
 Let them down for a moment if you can.
 So, my friend, Put down anything that may be a burden to you right now. Don't pick it up again until after you've rested a while." 
Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life:

* Accept that some days you're the pigeon,
 And some days you're the statue.

* Always keep your words soft and sweet,
 Just in case you have to eat them.

* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be
 "Recalled" by their maker.

* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again,
 It was probably worth it.

* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to be kind to others.

* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time,
 Because then you won't have a leg to stand on.

* Nobody cares if you can't dance well.
 Just get up and dance.

* When everything's coming your way,
 You're in the wrong lane.

* Birthdays are good for you.
 The more you have, the longer you live.

* You may be only one person in the world,
 But you may also be the world to one person.

* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

* We could learn a lot from crayons... Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.

*A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

 

5 Keys to Happiness By Greg Soltis, LiveScience Staff

If you're not happy and you know it read along.
You've watched "Seinfeld" re-runs, splurged on yourself and downed pints of Ben and Jerry's. Nothing's helping. Maybe you're one of the 20 million Americans diagnosed with depression, you're bottoming out or you just want something to improve your day.
Here are five ways — some admittedly challenging — to help you get that much-needed mood boost:

My Mom and Dad, 50th Wedding Anniversary

I picked good parents!!!

1. Pick good parents
In Happy Land, genes trump environmental factors, according to the experts. And a study in the March issue of the journal Psychological Science scores another point for the gene team: Differences in DNA that could explain why some people tend to have an extra bounce in their step might also underlie the tendency to be more emotionally stable and socially and physically active.
Genes do not provide free passes from the doldrums, and other external factors will still try to mow you down. But, heredity could provide some people with a horde of happiness that they can draw from when the good times aren’t rolling.
And Canadian researchers' ability to genetically stifle depression in mice in 2006 indicates that human happiness could one day be improved by manipulating genes. This was the first time science throttled the throes of any organism. Mice bred to be void of the gene, called TREK-1, acted as if they had been downing anti-depressants for at least three weeks.
2. Give it away
It only takes $5 spent on others to make you happier on a given day, according to a 2008 study. And selfless acts can also help your marriage become a more enjoyable experience for you and your spouse.

After performing good deeds, people are happier and feel their life has more purpose. But is the act selfless if you expect something in return? Maybe it just depends on how you look at it.
3. Ponder this
Think of a happy place. And you, too, like Happy Gilmore, might sink that putt and earn back your grandmother's house — or overcome your own hurdle.
Humans are more resilient than we think and can endure trying times, as demonstrated in a 2005 study that tracked mood changes in dialysis patients. They were in a good mood most of the time despite having their blood cleaned three times a week for at least three months. But healthy patients envisioned a miserable life when asked to imagine adhering to this demanding schedule.
As Winston Churchill said, "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."
4. Work out
Consistently breaking a sweat, along with medication and counseling can help people battling depression by sapping lonely and vulnerable feelings.
Exercise improves one's state of mind in part by affecting the body's levels of two chemicals: cortisol and endorphins. The adrenal glands of angry or scared people produce cortisol. This increases blood pressure and blood sugar, weakens the immune response and can lead to organ inflammation and damage. But working out burns cortisol, restoring the body's normal levels.
Running, biking or using an aerobic exercise machine also causes the brain to release endorphins — the body's natural pain relievers — into the bloodstream. The body foregoes the negative side effects of drugs while still experiencing a natural high. To gain the most from your workout, make sure its intensity reflects your stress level. And challenge your body to continually adapt by varying the exercise’s length and intensity.
5. Live long
If you have the right genes and are selfless, optimistic and active but still find yourself down in the dumps, just give it some time.
A study of 2 million people from 80 nations released in January found that depression is most common among adults in their mid-40s. Among Americans, the worst of times hit women around age 40 and men about age 50.
But with age humans are more inclined to filter out the negatives while focusing on what they enjoy.
Americans in their golden years tend to see the glass as half full, despite their increased doctor visits and chemo treatments. After battling cancer, heart disease, diabetes or other health-related obstacles, 500 independent Americans from age 60 to 98 rated their own degree of successful aging as 8.4 on average, with 10 being the highest in a 2005 study.

Me and my sis.  Circa 1968.

Happiness, it seems, takes time.

Happiest States: Hawaii Moves into First Place

AP – A couple walks along the water's edge at Lanikai Beach in the haze of heavy 'vog' giving the sky, ocean …

Jeanna Bryner
LiveScience Managing Editor
LiveScience.com jeanna Bryner
livescience Managing Editor
livescience.com – Tue Feb 16, 10:16 am ET

If you needed an extra twist of the arm to set off on a Hawaii vacation, here it is: The big-wave state was the happiest place to live in 2009, according to a newly released national survey.
Topping the well-being list among all 50 states, Hawaii pulled ahead of the 2008 leader Utah. But Utah and its neighbors still have plenty to smile about. Nine of the top 10 well-being states reside in the Midwest and the West. The south didn't fare so well, taking seven of the 11 lowest well-being spots on the list.
The results come from interviews with more than 350,000 American adults who took part in the Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index in 2009. This is the second year of the survey.
The well-being score for each state is an average of six sub-categories, including: life evaluation (self-evaluation about your present life situation and anticipated one in five years); emotional health; work environment (such as job satisfaction); physical health; healthy behavior; basic access (access to healthcare, a doctor, a safe place to exercise and walk, as well as community satisfaction).
The top 10 states and their average well-being scores (out of a possible 100 points):

• Hawaii: 70.2
• Utah: 68.3
• Montana: 68.3
• Minnesota: 67.8
• Iowa: 67.6
• Vermont: 67.4
• Colorado: 67.3
• Alaska: 67.3
• North Dakota: 67.3
• Kansas: 67.2

A complete list of the 2009 happiest states is here.
Hawaii also topped the charts for life evaluation, emotional health and physical health, while West Virginia scored the worst on those indexes. Utah was number-one for work environment, scoring 10 points more than the worst state, Delaware.
Bad news for Mississippi, which scored lowest on the basic access index. For healthy behavior, Vermont topped the list while Kentucky scored the worst.
Overall, state well-being stayed pretty stable from 2008 to 2009. Only four states - South Dakota, Mississippi, Hawaii, and Iowa - upped their scores by two or more points compared with 2008. Wyoming had the greatest drop of 1.3 points since 2008. Compared with 2008, 18 states moved in a negative direction, 27 in a positive direction, and five stayed the same.
As for why one state tops the list while another fails miserably, in the past researchers have looked at the relationship between 2008 well-being scores and various factors, including economic indicators, education levels, personality traits and levels of inclusiveness. They found the states with higher gross regional product (GRP) per capita (level of productivity and standard of living), higher income levels and higher median housing value, were significantly happier than poorer areas.
In addition, the happiest states in 2008 tended to have more residents with advanced educations and jobs that were considered "super-creative," such as architecture, engineering, computer and math occupations, library positions, arts and design work, as well as entertainment, sports and media occupations.
Level of inclusiveness was also important, according to the research on the 2008 scores, with some of the states scoring best for well-being also being the most tolerant.
If you're wondering if people in a particular state are happy, you might just want to ask them. Another team of researchers reported results last year in the journal Science showing that a person's self-reported happiness matches up with objective measures of well-being. A separate happiest states list, generated from the individual surveys of this study, differed from the 2008 and 2009 lists that relied on the Gallup-Healthways data.
Essentially, the team publishing their work in Science used their data to statistically create a representative American. That way they could take, for example, a 38-year-old woman with a high-school diploma and making medium-wage who is living anywhere and transplant her to another state and get a rough estimate of her happiness level.

• Happiness Makes Us Adventurous
• Happiness Is ... Being Old, Male and Republican
• 5 Keys to Happiness

• Original Story: Happiest States: Hawaii Moves into First Place

LiveScience.com chronicles the daily advances and innovations made in science and technology. We take on the misconceptions that often pop up around scientific discoveries and deliver short, provocative explanations with a certain wit and style. Check out our science videos, Trivia & Quizzes and Top 10s. Join our community to debate hot-button issues like stem cells, climate change and evolution. You can also sign up for free newsletters, register for RSS feeds and get cool gadgets at the LiveScience Store.

15 Simple ways to be happier in 2010

This article was written by Janice Taylor, a Life and Wellness coach at Intent.com
 

"Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking." ~ Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
 
With Marcus Aurelius Antoninus' quote in mind, I invite you to explore these 15 Simple Ways to create happiness in 2010!

1. Be your own BFF (best friend forever). Enjoy your own company. Embrace everything about you! Without a doubt, it's the most important step towards being a happy person.
2. Smile, giggle, snicker, or chuckle! Smiling releases serotonin in the brain, which instantaneously gives your mood a lift.
3. Dream big in every area of life. Set your life in motion and manifest your heart's desire.
4. Shut the doors and the windows tight! And then put on your favorite song and sing out loud. Let it rip!
5. Cook a healthy, delicious meal. Serve it up pretty and savor the flavor, one bite at a time.
6. Expect a miracle. Believe that something wonderful will happen for you today. The universe is waiting to shower happy blessings on you.
7. Meditate, pray and chant. Research shows that people who are spiritual tend to be happier and healthier than those who are not.
8. Pull up your best pair of warm socks. Wiggle your toes and enjoy a cozy kind of bliss.
9. Sleep baby sleep. Seven or eight hours each night should increase your energy and decrease your moodiness.
10. Count your blessings daily. Gratitude, the emotion of thankfulness, is one of the key ingredients for living a happy life. Make gratitude a habit and happiness will be yours.
11. Wake up early! Start the day off on a happy foot, with a happy thought. The morning hours are full of spiritual energy and prana (life force).
12. Let the sun shine in. 20 minutes of sunlight per day improves mood and wards of Seasonal Affection Disorder (SAD).
13. Take a hot bath. Feel the tension melt away as you sink into a pool of happiness.
14. Say "Good Job!" Give yourself permission to pat yourself on the back. Recognize your accomplishments and positive qualities.
15. Happiness is contagious! Surround yourself with happy, positive people who share your values, your goals and dreams.

Happy New Year!

I sincerely hope you all have a wonderful 2010, and that it is a much better year than 2009!

Here's a great website featuring creative women, if you're interested: http://www.wherewomencreate.typepad.com

I've been reading Julia Child's book, My Life in France.  What a delight!  I can really relate to her in so many ways (maybe not quite as enthusiastically about learning to cook French food, but still...)  I loved her thoughts on how living in France expanded her mind and soul.  Moi aussi.  And her initial frustration/embarrassment in learning to speak French, "I loathed my gauche accent, my impoverished phraseology, my inability to communicate in any but the most rudimentary way."  But after living there five years, she became fluent!  Good for her.  I wish I could say I was fluent in French.  At one point in my life, I was fairly fluent, but not good enough, not by a long shot.  And what I knew way back when is now sorely gone or at least very rusty.  I want to get it back, and be even better than before.  Maybe this year?

Julia Child was a California girl (like me) and felt inadequate intellectually.  I remember feeling almost exactly like how she describes herself in France, "I was bothered by my lack of emotional and intellectual development.  I was not as quick and confident and verbally adept as I aspired to be......upon reflection, I decided I had three main weaknesses:  I was confused (evidenced by a lack of facts, an inability to coordinate my thoughts, and an inability to verbalize my ideas); I had a lack of confidence, which caused me to back down from forcefully stated positions, and I was overly emotional at the expense of careful, "scientific" thought.  I was thirty-seven years old and still discovering who I was."

I laughed at Julia's description of her sister, "Dort" driving around the Place de la Concord, chasing an insensitive man who had rammed her back bumper, yelling out, "Ce merde-monsieur a justement crache dans ma derriere!"  (translation: This shit-man just spat out into my butt!)  Its easy to say really stupid things when you're learning a new language!  Funny.

Some things to think about this season and in the coming year……2009/10

May you have warm words on a cold evening,

A full moon on a dark night,

And the road downhill all the way to your door.   

 Unknown

Books are the plane, and the train, and the road.  They are the destination and the journey.  They are home. – Anna Quindlen

Contentment with a little makes happiness.  – African Proverb

There is a simple memory aid that you can use to determine whether it is the correct time or order chocolate dishes:   any month whose name contains the letter A, E, or U is the proper time for chocolate.  – Sandra Boynton

You don’t always win your battles, but it’s good to know you fought. – Lauren Bacall

Life is all about how you handle Plan “B” – Unknown

The best moments in reading are when you come across something – a thought, a feeling, a way of looking at things – which you had thought unique and particular to you.  Now here it is, set down by someone else, a person you have never met, someone even who is long dead.  And it is as if a hand has come out and taken yours.  – Alan Bennett

One of the sweetest things in life:  a letter from a friend.  – Andy Rooney

Enjoy the little things for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. – Unknown

No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the Continent, a part of the main. – John Donne

Une maison sans chat, c’est la vie sans soleil!  (A house without a cat is like life without sunshine) – Therese Asche, one of Julia Child’s friends

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. – William Arthur Ward

What you think about yourself is much more important than what others think of you.  – Marcus Anneaus Seneca

May you never forget what is worth remembering and never remember what is best forgotten.  Unknown

I feel the capacity to care is the thing which gives life its deepest significance.  – Pablo Casals

Flatter me, and I may not believe you.  Criticize me, and I may not like you.  Ignore me, and I may not forgive you.  Encourage me, and I will not forget you.  – William Arthur Ward

I would be most content if my children grew up to be the kind of people who think decorating consists mostly of building enough bookshelves.  --  Anna Quindlen

Memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, and the things you never want to lose.  – Kevin Arnold

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. – Danny Kaye

Happiness = Friendship

Today, I spent three hours sitting in a local restaurant, sharing lunch and gabbing with my neighbor.  We had such a good time together.   Our conversation revolved around the joys and challenges of parenting (she has three-year-old twin boys; my three kids are nearly grown), missionary work, college football, our concern for an ailing neighbor, Christmas music and the responsibility of doing our best to serve others.  I left our lunch meeting feeling uplifted, renewed and so grateful for the love and concern of my many, many dear friends, who have such an impact for good upon me.  Where would I be without my friends?  Wonderful people, of all ages, colors, shapes, sizes, interests and backgrounds, who have shaped my own perceptions.  Friends from elementary school, high school, college, Paris, church, work.......the list goes on and on.  Many of my friends know me better than my own siblings, simply because I have shared more of my life with them--17 years in Texas!  I have often felt that our relationships are the only things that matter--relationship to God, to our families, our friends, our neighbors, even strangers.  The quality of our relationships is a measure of the depth of our souls.  In this way, I have been truly blessed.  Thank you, my friends, for sharing your life with me.

Creativity = satisfaction and fulfillment, i.e. HAPPINESS

Creativity is a huge part of happiness for me.  When I am making something, I just feel good.  I come from a creative family.  My mother was probably one of the first “Martha Stewart” types of homemakers.  She could and would make just about anything, out of a variety of materials—often improvised and usually very inexpensive.  She was a great cook, a master seamstress, the original scrap booker, and the Queen of do-it-yourself home improvement projects (with my father as her trusty side-kick).  Every house our family lived in was remodeled on a consistent basis.  We learned to live amongst the ongoing transition.

As an adult, I have come to truly appreciate how my parents instilled creativity and the constant pursuit of excellence.  Fortunately, I married an artist, so I am continuing the tradition—with my own unique twist.  I’m hoping my own children will follow along the same path.  We’ll see.

I often hear people claim that they don’t have any talents, or they don’t have any creativity within them.  They feel intimidated at the thought of being “creative.”  I think this quote from Deiter Uchtdorf is the perfect answer to that dilemma:

“The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before. Everyone can create. You don’t need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty. Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty. . . . You may think you don’t have talents, but that is a false assumption, for we all have talents and gifts, every one of us. The bounds of creativity extend far beyond the limits of a canvas or a sheet of paper and do not require a brush, a pen, or the keys of a piano. Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before.”

Bookstores make me happy

Last night, my son and I went out for dinner and then to the bookstore.  He just recently returned home from spending two years in Mexico as a missionary.  He is anxious to start reading in English.  So we took a look around.  We each bought a couple of books.  I got Muriel Barbery's newest book, Gourmet Rhapsody.  I loved The Elegance of the Hedgehog, so we'll see if I like this new one.

I think bookstores are such great, comforting places--especially on a cold, rainy fall day like today.  I'm in here, working on my laptop via free wifi, which is pretty awesome.  The bookstore in my neighborhood is a real community hangout--you're apt to find several of your neighbors and/or their kids wandering around.

I love browsing around, looking at titles, picking up a few that look interesting and maybe reading a page or two, to see if they're any good before I buy.  Here's a few interesting titles I found:  The Art of Happiness, by the Dalai Lama, 10th anniversary edition.

Here's what the Dalai Lama says (on the back jacket of the book): "Many years ago, I wrote, "If you want others to be happy, practice compassion; and if you want yourself to be happy, practice compassion."  The Buddhist tradition has, like many of the world's great spiritual traditions, exhorted us to live our lives compassionately.  These spiritual traditions teach us to feel connected with our fellow beings and with the world we live in.  They celebrate service to others as one of the highest virtues.  Today, growing scientific data confirms this insight.  Researchers on human happiness identify compassionate service to others to be one of the key characteristics shared by many of the world's happiest people."

I really believe that.  My church is totally focused on compassionate service, especially the Women's group.  And my experience, through the years, has led me to understand that when I get outside myself and serve others, I am definitely happier.

Another book title that grabbed my attention today: "Thin is the new Happy", a memoir by Valerie Frankel.  I like memoirs.  I haven't read this, but the back cover sounds like any woman who has struggled with their weight can relate to this book.  I'm not convinced that thin equals happiness.  My weight has gone up and down over the years, and although I admit to being happier with the way I LOOK when I'm thinner, I certainly don't think all my problems went away just because I was thin. I think the things you DO to become thin (such as eat healthier and exercise) cause you to feel better, body and soul, and the way you look is just a nice byproduct.  Too bad our society puts so much emphasis on how you look.   When I was thinner, I received countless compliments, heralding my weight loss as though I had achieved some spectacular feat.  In reality, I was at a very unhappy spot in my life.  It got to the point where I really hated people making comments about it all the time.  So I gained back some of the weight.  Now people don't bug me so much!

Are you HAPPY?

I found this through a friend and thought it was terrific!  It is from H/34: Creative Works by Alex Koplin.  Apparently you can go on his blog and purchase a poster of it.

Smile, though your heart is breaking......

No, my heart isn't exactly breaking today....but--I have to say that smiling and humor are huge benefits to my mood.  I got the following off the helpguide.org website:

Humor is infectious. The sound of roaring laughter is far more contagious than any cough, sniffle, or sneeze. When laughter is shared, it binds people together and increases happiness and intimacy. In addition to the domino effect of joy and amusement, laughter also triggers healthy physical changes in the body. Humor and laughter strengthen your immune system, boost your energy, diminish pain, and protect you from the damaging effects of stress. Best of all, this priceless medicine is fun, free, and easy to use.

Laughter is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict. Nothing works faster or more dependably to bring your mind and body back into balance than a good laugh. Humor lightens your burdens, inspires hopes, connects you to others, and keeps you grounded, focused, and alert.

One of my most  powerful mentors, my grandmother, was a very happy person.  She smiled and laughed a lot.  She was just so much fun to be around.  Everyone loved her.  She lived well into her 90's and although her body was broken down at the end, she rarely felt pain.  This may be due to the fact that she laughed so much.  I'd like to think so, anyway.

One of my friends, while going through an especially difficult time, rented a bunch of funny movies and sat and watched them over and over again, laughing and laughing until he was exhausted.  He felt better after that.

This morning, I was referred to a website called mylifeisaverage.com.  Its just small posts about funny things that happen to people every day.  Some of them are truly hilarious.  I laughed a lot.  And I feel better--despite the fact that the water to my house is off for the 7th time in 6th months, due to a huge leak in the water main, and the plumber keeps fixing it--and it keeps breaking, and it has cost me a ton of money!!!!  All the things I was going to do this morning, such as shower, do laundry, mop the floor, etc. cannot be done because I have NO WATER!!!!  So, instead of cry, I'll just read funny things and LAUGH!!!

Having a grateful heart brings us peace....From my friend KM

Psalms 100:

Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.  Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing.  Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.  Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.

The lds.org website tells us that “Gratitude is a feeling of appreciation and thankfulness for blessings or benefits we have received – that as we cultivate a grateful attitude, we are more likely to be happy and spiritually strong.  It says that Gratitude is an uplifting, exalting attitude. People are generally happier when they have gratitude in their hearts. We cannot be bitter, resentful, or mean-spirited when we are grateful.

We should thank our Heavenly Father for His goodness to us by acknowledging His hand in all things, thanking Him for all that He gives us, keeping His commandments, and serving others. We should especially thank Him for His Beloved Son, Jesus Christ, for the Savior's great example, for His teachings, for His outreaching hand to lift and help, for His infinite Atonement.”

Let’s first explore what having a grateful heart means.

In Luke 17:12-19 we find the story of the 10 lepers. As the Savior went through Samaria and Galilee, “he entered into a certain village, [and] there met him ten men that were lepers” who “lifted up their voices, and said, Jesus, Master, have mercy on us.” Jesus told them to go show themselves unto the priest.

“And it came to pass, that, as they went, they were cleansed.

“And one of them, when he saw that he was healed, turned back, and with a loud voice glorified God.

“And fell down … at his feet, giving him thanks: and he was a Samaritan.

“And Jesus answering said, were there not ten cleansed? But where are the nine?

“There are not found that returned to give glory to God, save this stranger.

“And he said unto him, Arise, go thy way: thy faith hath made thee whole” (Luke 17:12–19).

Only the Samaritan had a grateful heart.

In a conference talk given in 1996 President James E. Faust had this to say about this particular example of gratitude from the scriptures:

Leprosy was so loathsome a disease that those afflicted were not permitted under the law to come close to Jesus. Those suffering from this terrible disease were required to agonize together, sharing their common misery. (See Lev. 13:45-46) Their forlorn cry, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us,” must have touched the Savior’s heart. When they were healed and had received priestly approval that they were clean and acceptable in society, they must have been overcome with joy and amazement. Having received so great a miracle, they seemed completely satisfied. But they forgot their benefactor. It is difficult to understand why they were so lacking in gratitude. Such ingratitude is self-centered. It is a form of pride.

What is the significance of the fact that the one who returned to give thanks was a Samaritan? As in the story of the Good Samaritan, the point seems to be that those of lesser social or economic status often rise to a greater duty and nobility.

A grateful heart, continues President Faust, is a beginning of greatness. It is an expression of humility. It is a foundation for the development of such virtues as prayer, faith, courage, contentment, happiness, love, and well being. As with all commandments, gratitude is a description of a successful mode of living. The thankful heart opens our eyes to a multitude of blessings that continually surround us.”

In the Doctrine and Covenants 78:19 the Lord said “And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more.”

Steven Snow, in an October 2001 General Conference address, said this about Gratitude:  “It is human nature, I suppose, to seek elsewhere for our happiness. Pursuit of career goals, wealth, and material rewards can cloud our perspective and often leads to a lack of appreciation for the bounteous blessings of our present circumstances.

It is precarious to dwell on why we have not been given more. It is, however, beneficial and humbling to dwell on why we have been given so much.  An old proverb states, “The greater wealth is contentment with a little.”

In his letter to the Philippians, Paul wrote, “Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content” (Philip. 4:11).”

President Joseph F. Smith has instructed us that “the spirit of gratitude is always pleasant and satisfying because it carries with it a sense of helpfulness to others; it begets love and friendship, and engenders divine influence. Gratitude is said to be the memory of the heart” (Gospel Doctrine, 5th ed. [1939], 262).

How then does gratitude bring us peace?

This past week, as I’ve thought about what it means to have a grateful heart, and how it can bring me peace, I’ve thought about stepping stones.  Stepping stones made from round, generous pieces of solid foundation, which if followed, will lead me where I want to go.  Some of you may have seen silver necklaces or bracelets made with beads in the shape of small pebbles or stones with words on them such as love. Faith. Courage. Hope.  I envision my stepping stones, similarly marked as I’ll describe.

If my destination is peace, then the first step forward must be honesty.  Because having a grateful heart is, first of all, acknowledging the many gifts, kindnesses and blessings that I receive on a daily basis – no matter how routine, small or seemingly insignificant they may be.  To be truly grateful, I must then give thanks.  This can be done verbally, or in writing, with a smile, handshake or hug, or on my knees in prayer.  Next, having a grateful heart means being content with what I have been given.  It doesn’t mean “thank you for the lovely gift, BUT could I have some more, or could I have a slightly different color, or could you hold that for me until next week … .  it means being content with what I have been given.

Having a grateful heart frees me from greed.  Freedom from greed  returns to me as a gift of time – time not spent in “busily pursuing” things that have no lasting value.   If I have a grateful heart I can enjoy a sense of serenity, and a feeling of calm.  

Finally, I came to realize that gratitude for the all the gifts that I have been given, and those that I receive through living the gospel will bring me peace, in this life and the next - and it will bring me closer to the peacemaker.

The peace of Christ does not come by seeking the superficial things of life; neither does it come except as it springs from the individual’s heart.  David. O McKay, Conference report, Oct. 1938

The dictionary definition states that peace is a state of tranquility or quiet, freedom from disquieting thoughts or emotions, and harmony in personal relations.  According to Joseph B. Wirthlin, in the scriptures, peace means either freedom from strife, contention, conflict, or war - or an inner calm and comfort born of the Spirit that is a gift of God to all of his children, an assurance and serenity within a person’s heart. (Joseph B. Wirthlin, Peace Within, May 1991) 

Marion G Romney, suggested that we might think of peace as “harmony within one’s self, and with God and man.”

Joseph B. Wirthlin gave an excellent talk entitled Peace Within in April 1991, largely based on another wonderful talk, entitled The Price of Peace that Marion G. Romney had given 8 years earlier.  The following examples were outlined in these 2 talks.

During most of the world’s history, strife, dissension, and conflict have flourished and displaced peace. The times when peace has reigned, it began in the hearts of righteous, obedient individuals and grew until it engulfed a society. We have at least two scriptural accounts of periods of absolute peace:

The first of these periods of peace was among the people of Enoch, who lived before the great flood. They continued in righteousness, and “the Lord came and dwelt with” them. He “called his people Zion, because they were of one heart and one mind, and dwelt in righteousness.” They “built a city that was called the City of Holiness, even Zion” that, in the “process of time, was taken up into heaven.” (Moses 7:16–21.)  These people of Enoch are the only ones we know of in the scriptures that have obtained lasting perfect peace.

The second period of peace followed the ministry of the resurrected Jesus among the Nephites. They abolished the works of evil and obtained the fruit of the Spirit. Quoting from the Book of Mormon: “The disciples of Jesus had formed a church of Christ. … And as many as did come unto them, and did truly repent of their sins, were baptized in the name of Jesus; and they did also receive the Holy Ghost.” (4 Ne. 1:1.) Consequently, “there were no contentions and disputations among them” (4 Ne. 1:2) “because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people. And there were no envyings, nor strifes, nor tumults, nor whoredoms, nor lyings, nor murders, nor any manner of lasciviousness.” (4 Ne. 1:15–16.) “They were in one, the children of Christ, and heirs to the kingdom of God.” (4 Ne. 1:17.) “And every man did deal justly one with another.” (4 Ne. 1:2.) “And surely there could not be a happier people among all the people who had been created by the hand of God.” (4 Ne. 1:16.)

Peace prevailed among the Nephites for almost two centuries. Then some of them deserted the teachings of Jesus Christ and turned to wickedness and selfish pride  [ingratitude]. Within another two centuries, the Nephite nation that had enjoyed this long period of perfect peace had destroyed itself in savage civil war.

How can we cultivate and a grateful heart? 

The short answer is through practice. 

President Monson once said that we should “think to thank”. 

Henry B. Eyring, in a 1989 conference address suggested that we can begin a private prayer with thanks.  We can start to count our blessings, and then pause for a moment.  If we exercise faith, and with the gift of the Holy Ghost, we will find that memories of other blessings will flood into our minds.  If we begin to express

gratitude for each of them, our prayer may take a little longer than usual.  Remembrance will come.  And so will gratitude.

President Spencer W. Kimball said that Journals are a way of counting our blessings and of leaving an inventory of these blessings for our posterity.  As we start to write, we can ask ourselves, “How did God bless me today?”

The Prophet Joseph Smith assured us that we can enjoy that peace of God which passeth human understanding (noted in Philip. 4:7.) We can enjoy it personally, within our families, in our communities, in our nations, and in our world if we will do the things that produce it. This peace leads to happiness.

(See Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, pp. 255–56.)

As I’ve outlined, one of the things that produces peace is showing gratitude, or having a grateful heart.  And what better time of year to practice showing gratitude than now.

President J. Reuben Clark, wisely counseled: “Hold fast to the blessings which God has provided for you. Yours is not the task to gain them, they are here; yours is the part of cherishing them” (Church News, 14 June 1969, 2).

I echo his wishes that we may cultivate grateful hearts so that we may cherish the multitude of blessings that God has so graciously bestowed upon us. May we openly express such gratitude to our Father in Heaven and our fellowmen and may we live in peace.

“Live in peace,” said the Apostle Paul, “and the God of love and peace shall be with you” (2 Cor. 13:11).

This is why I cook a meal for my family every night.

Another shout out to my friend A. for referring me to yet another excellent video by Alain de Boton. This time, I learned about Epicurus, a Greek philosopher. I have long been acquainted with the term “Epicurean” – defined as a person enjoying a rich, indulgent and luxurious lifestyle. This, in fact, is a bit of a misnomer. Although Epicurus did not see anything wrong with “enjoying” life, he wasn’t exactly a self-indulgent slug, either. His main premise is: What we want is not usually what we need. We look for happiness in material goods, wealth, etc. What we really need instead is three things: friends (especially eating meals together), freedom and self-reliance, and self reflection, or an “analyzed life.” Diogenes, a follower of Epicurus, built a wall around the market place, with Epicurus’ philosophy inscribed in the stones—a constant reminder or advertisement for happiness, so all the citizens could learn and be inspired by it. In a way, having a blog is a modern day version of the Diogenes wall—stating ideas and thoughts in hopes of encouraging discussion and learning from the ongoing dialogue.

Happiness is what you make it.....

Thanks to my friend A. for this video clip.  The presenter is Dan Gilbert, and the topic is: "Why are we happy? Why aren't we happy?" Gilbert is a psychology professor at Harvard, and author of "Stumbling on Happiness".  In this fascinating talk, Gilbert discusses revealing data from experiments on various students and amnesia patients how our brains choose happiness, no matter what happens to us. In other words, even if we don't get what we originally wanted, we decide eventually that what we ended up with was better anyway, and therefore we are happier.  This speaks to the spiritual doctrine that "trials" in life, given to us by God, are really better for us in the end because we learn and grow as a result of the stress.  I believe in this principle, simply because I've experienced it myself.  If it were possible (and it is not) for a person to live a life of complete ease and lack of problems, how would they possibly develop any character or depth to their soul?  So--back to square one: the idea that  we can choose to be happy.  This is sometimes difficult to accept when you are in the midst of a problem or challenge.  But eventually, you can get there if you stick it out.  My question is, how does one really find joy in the moment (even if the moment is uncomfortable, painful, sad, whatever).  I'm not sure that is possible.  And I do think some people, not wanting to "embrace" happiness in that moment, choose bitterness, lose their faith, go into denial, or flee the situation.  I think, to be happy, you can allow yourself an appropriate amount of time to grieve, be angry, sad, or whatever--and then move on and embrace what you have learned from the experience, eventually achieving a level of peace and resulting happiness.  But it is usually a long process, at least for me.

Happiness in relationship to confidence and fear....and aging

From a friend, K:

I just spoke with a friend here who will soon be 70 yrs.  I mentioned our ongoing discussion about happiness, etc.  She is amazing.  She lost two children in a car accident coming home for Christmas from BYU years and years ago.  She is a 10 year survivor of ovarian cancer.  Last year she lost a dear son-in-law to a car accident.

She is so faithful and keeps plugging on always, without focusing on herself.  She thinks part of a lack of happiness as we age has to do with a loss of confidence - of physically and mentally being able to tackle tasks that she once could.  She also thinks fear comes into it as we age.  More fear, less confidence - more sadness.

And a rebuttal, from another friend, L.

First, I must say that I read an article earlier this year that rings much more true about aging and happiness than the Huff Post article we've all been discussing.  That the middle years really are times of crisis where people reassess where they've been and feel the pinch of time, etc.  But if they navigate themselves successfully through this time of transition and find renewed purpose, studies have shown that age 70 is one of the happiest times of life. (This was a study of both men and women)

By the time you're 70, you can relax; don't have the worries of establishing career, family, etc.  In fact, the study showed that 70 year olds were on par with happiness of 20 year olds!

I couldn't disagree with your friend more in terms of confidence and fear.  I think that confidence increases as we build up life experience!  And we become less fearful.  Like, I used to worry so much more about image and what other people might think.  Now I don't give a rip.  I think that that really sharply drops off with age.  You just become more independent in thought and with more than half your life already passed; you come to a place of "It is what it is". 

My 30 year class reunion was the most fun because everyone's pretenses had dropped away.  At the 10 year reunion we were all trying to look very successful.  AT the 20 year, we were all trying to show the perfect children and families.  At the 30 year, we all just looked at each other and said, "Well, this is it."  Turned up the music and boogied down!!!

I do think that it's not fun lose the physical prowess that we had as young people.  Sometimes, when I see how others are aging, it gives me a window into how I must be.

Nevertheless, I'm more confident and fearless than I've ever been.  I think that that is life's gift as we lose the quickness and agility of youth, in both mind and body.  We just don't care anymore and begin to approach what we've got left in life with a reclaimed childlike joyousness.